pedialite and red bull = repair kit
you were watching a documentary about sharks and wouldn't stop stroking my legs and whispering "what if they could walk?"
i just hugged the lady at the liquor store goodbye for the summer...
I can't get a boner in the bathroom of a buffet.
the last time i saw him was an hour he was floating face down in a pool... but i'm sure he's fine.
Judging by her face, I'd say she's at least dabbled with meth...
he built a boat made of joints. holyyy shit
knew it was a bad idea. the look she gave me when i left her roommates bedroom in the morning really illustrated that.
My 16 year old neighbor is throwing a rager cuz her parents are out of town and my brother and I are sitting on the porch listening to A) someone fuck on the trampoline B) a girl bawling about her parents finding out C) someone puking in what we think is the hot tub. And overall we take a shot everytime someone says "bra"
He is asleep with his dick hanging out of my my little pony pajamas. I am required to wake this man up by blowjob
Your sexual fantasies often terrify me but get a pic
The guy next to me just said he wont play beer pong on principle. Im scared.
She can't brag about all the anal sex she has and then expect me not to awkwardly stare at her boyfriend when she brings him around
Last thing I remember was a hand in the pants. Then I woke up next to a full beer and a McDouble, which I promptly had for breakfast.
"I made out with someone too, but then he tried to fuck and I played dead"
How many ballsacks did you see last night because I saw eight
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