He had personality for days, but cock for only minutes
When you want to head down the cleveland on Sunday?
What time do the bars open? I dont want to remember how bad theyre gonna lose
So we tried to 69 with him on top. NEVER TRY IT. His balls were in my eyes and it was terrifying.
Okay I'm all about any plan that ends with "We're gonna get you drunk."
It was odd. His friends dick tasted the same as his. Friends are beginning to have to much in common
We all know tonight is going to end like every other night with you. drunk, pantless and confused. Dont try to switch things up.
don't forget friday is see who can get the most free drinks at the gay bar contest. winner gets $50
If you have a glass table... Put it up. I don't wanna hurt myself again, I just got my stitches out...
He's single. I'm single. We should rekindle our eighth grade romance over a box of wine and carefree sex.
Your choices in alcohol this weekend are thoroughly disappointing
Don't you hate falling asleep on the couch with a glass of wine in your hand? It's like dreaming about peeing and then realizing you've peed the bed only stickier.
Worse. He's Mormon. At least a gay guy will go get drinks with me.
You can be responsible and still be on that ho life
He was like "why do you look so cute today?" and I said "I showered" and he laughed. I wasn't making a joke
I don't know if I'm having early flu symptoms, a miscarriage, or am badly hungover. Web md agrees.
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