'hiiiigh' is saved in my t9 for a reason
ofcourse shes the first one pregnant. wasnt she the one who asked the middle school health teacher how many calories are in sperm?
about to try to wax my asshole... wish me luck
What'd you guys eat?
Literally everything that was frozen.
I think I've lost the thrill of being a slut. It's just that the newness has worn off, I think.
I got a letter from the home owners association saying its against policy to have sex on the trampoline.
He wheeled me around walmart in a cart, and stole at least 30 dollars of junior mints fpr me. Best date ever.
The hookup that almost was... Both partys too drunk to migrate to the other.... the universe has won this one.
Good thing I left work early to shave my balls because traffic sucked ass, which I was written up for and my reason on the write was "to close on time, have to shave balls for date tonight". Oh yea, that was a bold statement right there
It looks like I colored my belly button red at some point
see that vagina ? that vagina means business
being single and having a boyfriend 300 miles away is eerily similar. never skipped a beat eating hot wings in my bed with no pants or masturbating every day.
He was 6'8" - I shit you not! He sat up in my bed and the ceiling fan got him right in the forehead.
Is it bad that I'm not at all bothered by the fact that to some people I'm simply known as the girl that takes her shirt off?
My breath smells like dick and biscuits..
Randomize
