My relationship with VH1 is so bittersweet
Leave Me Alone
At least least me cry on your voice mail
She's the hottest girl I've ever seen before and didn't lose her virginity until she was 19. As men, I take it as failure on our part that hot 19 year old virgins still exist.
I thanked her dad for "firing off a good one" when she was conceived. She said thats why he doesnt like me.
Ideas for halloween. We need simple yet hilarious. Cheap yet effective. Slutty yet acceptable. Go.
See, it wasn't that I broke my nose having sex. Its that I forgot about the bedposts...
Are you awake? I feel like I need to confess my sins to someone not on this side of the country.
At least your road beer policy is responsible. Well, relatively speaking.
I know I swore I wouldn't go home with him, but he whispered that he had taquitos and you know how much drunk me loves taquitos.
Literally sucked a dick for ten seconds before I said to myself, this tiny ass penis isn't worth it. My night last night
I take Paypal, cash, sexual favors, and roasted red potatoes with garlic as payment. You choose.
My mother expressed her concerns about my drinking via a facebook message.
Sometimes, it’s important to take a moment and kinkshame yourself.
I got conspiracy theory drunk.
His nipple licking is glorious
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