its like his balls were made of silver and he was trying to polish the tarnish off
I puked off the balcony.
Not horrible
Into the hottub. There were six people in it. I had eaten all their pizza.
Just assessed the damage in the bath. Two love bites. One bruise on the inner thigh. Strange awareness of what i'm assuming is my cervix. I've definitely missed you. x
The djing cat is back again. I think he just makes appearances when im shit drunk just to fuck with my mind.
i may have reached my "but im high so it's cool" quota for the month.
Both his mom and his sister were hitting on me when I stopped by today. He isn't a real friend anyway, right?
I have already decided that it happened in an alternate universe since both of the people involved don't remember it and we only have the word of a sober person that it happened at all
If you're receiving this text it's probably because I drunkenly flashed you on Saturday. Sorry for forcing you to look at my tits. That was uncalled for.
So my nipple piercings were only $20 because it's breast cancer awareness month. Fuck yes!
Had a crazy moment last night. Had to get up, run to bathroom, pop 3 Xanax, sit on bathroom floor and rock myself in fetal position. Not my best moment.
It's meant to be, Cynthia. You, him, and your developed breasts are meant for each other.
Came home from this girls horse at 6am to find a guy lighting off roman candles in front of my door. Best walk of fame I've ever had.
She's really sweet and cute, but when she drinks, she becomes way too proud of her bush.
hooked up with someone last night while wearing walrus pajama pants. clearly I'm accomplishing big things in life
why is there a thong in the fridge-NOT MINE-and a half of a pickle on the stairs?!
I don't wear thongs. The picle was for dipping. Ill explain later. Lacy or plain thong ?
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