Single schmingle. No one actually obeys the relationship boundaries these days. Its 2009.
it's already thursday and i haven't gotten drunk yet...something's not right.
His mom told be she once got turned down for playboy. 1 biggest mistake Hugh made. 2 is she hitting on me?
She told me she wanted to wax my ass. I'm terrified and oddly aroused.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
in light of our recent drunken behavior, i think it's time we seriously consider hiring ourselves a babysitter.
I'm using the size of your dick as a guage to see how big something is on Amazon. Any questions?
you covered his dog in toothpaste. safe to say hes not gonna call you.
She just licked her nipple in public to get a free bar tab.
There needs to be a crayon color for how blue my balls are
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
please tell me we weren't that bad as freshmen
i can't, we're worse now
Well, most of my extended family doesnt know about my love for the penis, so they dont have a reason to disown me
Met Dan at the park for lunch and the guy parked next to us was getting a BJ the entire time. Way to make me feel like an inadequate girlfriend, random park skank. All Dan got was a double cheeseburger and a large iced tea...
Okay, I just got to our real hotel and the YMCA may have been a better choice. A man w/ no shirt on
Easter was a success. We had an egg hunt and hid weed and conforms inside them. Cooked a ham, made some jello, got wasted. THIS is adulthood?!
That chick keeps sending eggplant emojis
Welcome to dating in the digital age. Better catch up now that you’re divorced
and eggplant is code for penis. It means she’s DTF. Go get her tiger!!!
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