last night i found where hot topic managers go to die after they get fired.
We have sex, then he cooks. It's like a fantasy.
oh hey just found a glowstick in my tits. fuck yes new years eve
just saw an advertisement for the rock in the tooth fairy...can you say rock bottom?
you woke up and yelled "the tv is moving" and fell on the floor and passed back out
It took us hanging out like four times to kiss. Id like to fuck you before I'm 30
I figured that I'd start organizing the places ive given head. I'll add treehouse right after bandroom
Alright. I will breast feed the first person to get here.
I'm just going to text him the word sex repeatedly until he comes over.
Did it work?
Duh, it only took 27 texts and 15 minutes and he was at my front door.
He was on my bed looking at me like a sacrifice to the gods of gay sex and he's definitely a bottom. Like Jesus Christ a really, really great ass of a bottom.
He called me skinny, I broke his garbage disposal, then denied him sex. Normal second date etiquette.
MY WHOLE FAMLY IS TALKING ABOUT MY BUTT
WAIT I'M COMING I WANT TO TALK ABOUT IT TOO
Judging by his bulge. This guy is going home with me. Who doesn't want a dick that looks like it used to be a pillar in Rome.
Uhmmmm is there really any way to tactfully ask "you into me jerking you off with my feet... or nah" cause if you find one let me know 😂
Fine I’ll come with you but you better tell that guy to wear some longer shorts because the second I see a rogue nut I’m gone
Randomize
