I think my favourite thing about cubicles is the fact that I can pick my nose at work
I just found $40 in the jeans I wore last night. PS I also found the jeans I wore last night.
Got a basket, 50 condoms, some candy, 100 plastic eggs & my bunny costume. Campus will feel my wrath in 2 weeks
She was perfectly content just sitting in the middle of everyone blowing bubbles in the air.
Because its an amazing idea and you're the only one I can think of that will allow a pirate threesome
There are empty beer cans all over and the go-kart is missing. I need it for my halloween costume.
Hickey on my chest, threw out my elbow and now walking out my shame.
Youre getting too old for this
I legitimately forgot how to blow my nose just now. Sleep might be handy.
He made me sneak beer in the diaper bag... guess who is winning 2012 parents of the year
Send help, water and tortillas.
Like please, take your microdick and try to stick it someplace else. It is not welcome in my world.
drunk and crying about Shakespeare- how's your night?
I'm disgusted with myself. Who goes down on their Uber driver? This asshole
I don't know where I'm at. But I'm pretty sure what I'm looking at is a small bear.
Dentist appt at 2pm get milk poured on my tits by 2am
A marvelous 12 hours
Randomize
