so I called to to smoke and you didn't pick up so I smoked and now I'm a race car
Nope it's him. He's whispering to himself and buying asparagus.
I am kinda proud of you, its like seeing my slutty baby take its first step
It really ruins the moment when you have to ask to resend the nude pics.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
2 more and I will have fucked 75 percent of my acting class. best. elective. ever.
Michelle asked what I was wearing tonight. I responded with a g-string and plastic wrap. I've gotten no response since.
I almost bumped into a man wrapped only in a blanket at 10 am
We got a kitchen table so we would eat together more. So far we've played drunken monopoly and had sex on it.
Come to the roof. We are drinking breakfast.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he told me he liked me . I thought we were just fuck buddies . This ruins everything!
Do you ever have one of those days when your breasts are just fucking awesome?
I want you to know. From the bottom of my heart, that you are a great friend, a beautiful person, and one of my favorite people in this world. But if you ever send me that many messages again at 4am I swear to God, I will push you in from of a fast running rhino
Yea. You locked yourself outside naked with nothing but running shoes and claimed it was a "parent trap thing."
We were drunk at 3am with no food. I sent him to the lobby with ninety cents for like a bag of chips and I swear on my life he came back with a meatball sub
...did you ask him where he got a meatball sub at 3:00am?
He just kept mumbling something about being a hunter/gatherer
Oh AND he got us two bags of chips.
School supplies are right next to the margarita mix at target. Its a sign
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