Is it necrophilia if we're both dead?
oh there is nothing like the 1st beerbong of the school year
We had an indepth conversation about his employment at Arbys..
It was actually pretty good. His cock is as fat as the rest of him and I took out my contacts so I couldn't see him clearly.
And on the subject of embracing my inner whore, I had two different dicks in my mouth yesterday. Friend, it's official. I'm completely outta control.
I need to have some sort of hot sex experience in a mask.
So I think my aunt and her one legged boyfriend are getting it on in the next room. Traumatized does not even begin to describe what I am right now
Today's been pretty great, I went and bought the new Batman for the sole purpose of masturbating to Bane
Whenever you get off. By "pick me up from work" I mean, "pick me up from a bar by work at your earliest convenience" :)
I was so drugged up it was amazing, I felt like a dinosaur "because I enjoyed spinach, and I got apple juice and only dinosaurs get apple juice" according to me the day of, and last night I felt like a rocket ship
If I come in tomorrow with a cane and a seeing eye dog it's because I just mixed up my salicylic acid acne stuff with my eye makeup remover
chasing tequila with frosting. best baby shower ever.
she's always on high-alert for lesbians
So I got a text from him saying "jacking off...thinking of you" I think I'm going to get a restraining order
I’ve got a closet full of cosplay outfits and horny boytoy to help me ride out this pandemic
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