I dont shave on purpose to keep myself from being slutastic!! it usually works
what's Bukake?
a bad idea.
u know u need to get laid when watching mike wazowskis gf from monsters inc makes u horny
Skinny jeans should not be made in size 14. Then, it's just a lie.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
stop texting me from phones in the verizon store and pretending to be guys i talked to when i was drunk. its confusing.
At least drunk you showered before switching sex partners last night.
My mind hurts. I feel like I drank sand yesterday.
A guy just washed his hands in the toilet. No joke
you were sat in the corner crying until someone gave you a baguette, which you then tried to feed to the duck doorstop.
I regret nothing
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Somehow ended up home, probably had something to do with the makeshift ladder from my second story window. Now headed to church, still drunk, and still fighting back the vomit of a thousand different alcohols. Successful night.
I took Xanax and it did nothing to me. First sign I'm crazy and actually need it.
I just instagramed a picture of an ostrich in case you were wondering what I did with my night
getting busted for public urination is like, a step above j-walking. you'll be fine
Yes but I said "let's get a dog" not a drunk human so some rules will be established this evening
Now I have to go back and sober fuck him. For science.
Randomize