weed, chlorine, and victory. my bed smells like i had sex with michael phelps.
its officail im naming my first born child brickbreaker
At least it earned you a couple drinks. And something tells me you've touched grosser things with less incentive.
...that's why he's not doing anything with his life except breeding geckos
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
im almost positive that in mid thrust she told me she was pro choice
Nothing like a marijuana chart of usage in each country to make me understand math.
At what point in my life did a night that has strippers, belly dancers, tequila and a midget become "average"?
Which I'm also surprisingly fine with. If he walked into the bedroom naked, holding a fish in one hand and a lit candle in the other and said "Let's get fucking weird." I'd probably go with it. He's just that hot.
I gave them the 'I used to fuck your son' discount.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I came home wearing somebody's thong. If you're missing one message me privately.
But he has cupcakes AND I'm guaranteed an orgasm. .. I feel like I shouldn't even have to actually make a decision here.
thank you for being a reason not to completely check out of my life and start sleeping all day, crying all night, and living off vodka acquired through credit card debt
I left the party 20 min ago..just thought i would tell you so you wouldnt think i fell in the lake again
I just found peanut butter between my boobs. This was for you.
I just put together something from IKEA so that’s mandatory oral for a week.
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