I'm youtube-ing children's choirs. Am I adorable? Or am I a child predator?
Predator. Straight up.
I just got a rly sharp new razor and was shaving down there...
and?
RIP clitoris
I asked what she wanted from Hawaii. She said a baby like Aaden from JK 8.
where am I supposed to find one of those?
just hang any plant up and call it mistletoe.
My body isn't even mad at me...just disappointed
drinking out of a sandbucket again
She said her tits were too big, and he slapped her. He said that Jesus didn't appreciate bitches that fish for compliments
Come over. Drunk tacos.
That isn't even a sentence.
I kept the important parts.
That kid i sell weed to just had his mom give him a ride over here she waited in the car while he bought a bag
That was the #1 scariest moment in my life. I have full trust in you, I let you bite my penis for god sake.
T minus 20 hours until we forget our names, find some city cowboys, and g&t into the night.
Guy pissing in the corner in downtown Boston as his girlfriend is covering him up, yelling "relationship goals"
I will pepper spray him so fast I don't even care
I am rewearing my dress from last night. I only wore it for like two hours before fucking. And I took it off first so no cock contact. This is my new standard of cleanliness.
How do I stop your cat from bathing me? I'm afraid she'll get drunk off my sweat
Randomize
