We walked past a group of guys in front of a bar last night and they claimed, I quote: Wow, we'd actually have to work for that.
My jaw hurts. Such a slutty injury..
I got to watch him fuck me from behind in the reflection of an ornament. so glad I decorated.
It's only 4 pm and I'm already way past my preferred quota of "could have died" moments
just had to re-breakup with her. it was like shooting a dead horse that was crying and talking.
It's like playing clue with my own life. I have to piece together what I did, where I was, how I did it, and who I did it to
I've decided to be proactive and make a sex playlist on my phone to avoid any awkward moments in my upcoming slutty summer
Well, it's hard to say. Last night he puked a perfect circle around him on the floor, and then sat in it insisting it would protect him from the smoke monster. He's was still there last time I checked.
It's isn't revenge sex until you've cum on her porcelain doll collection.
I got up before the sun today. That makes me sun for the day.
When did you start smoking in order to be high by 4:30?
I. recorded a message of me yelling at myself to "get up out of that bed" and set it an alarm. REALLY loud
Who are you to come into MY house and tell me when I can or cannot take my pants off?
You were more fun when you didn't have morals.
Whose dick am I looking at? There are too many possibilities at the moment.
How you run into a glAss door three times in a row I do not know
Randomize
