i'm going to rape that little man
omg not your brother
College reaches a new low. We just carved a shot glass out of a potatoe.
Why would you say my penis is small in front of so many people?
y-o-u-r-e = you are, y-o-u-r = your. you are a bag of douche not your bag of douche. if you're going to insult me at least do it in proper english. that is all.
Im watching someone hooking up in the library
procrastination at its finest
It was mandatory to shotgun a beer before we were allowed to eat dinner
I'm really proud of her, she waited until she was on tiled floor to start puking on the ground
we found a loaf of bread in my bathroom i believe its yours. sorry i took a shower before we noticed so it might be soggy
we are all four or five tequila-induced decisions away from shitting in a bucket, come get me please.
My sister was crawling her way home and kept asking us to carry her,then she insisted on grabbing at our ankles til she passed out, how was your night?
Ya well here is the deal with last night, it was the Biggest shit show we have ever co-stared in.
Don't ever feel guilty about what you put in your mouth best advice my gma ever gave me lmao
you're the third guy in less than 24 hours she fucked. I'm glad you lost your virginity just don't act like you climbed Mt. Everest.
Please don't give away my fajitas
Im crying watching 9/11 footage eating spray can cheese in my pajamas.
Randomize
