What do you think she thinks of us?
I think she thinks we're whores... but ya I think she likes us
Get dressed up for her? please, I could shit my pants and she would still blow me
They pulled him over whille he had a fish tank full of beer in his front seat. He told them it coudn't count as an open container cause the top was on it.
I'll just wear something slutty to the liquor store and hope for the best
that's your solution for everything
Did your dad mention the fact that you asked him for viagra at 2 in the morning?
can we change the rule from "no one is ugly after 2 am" to 1130 so i can justify last night
there were like 150 questions AFTER the application. you'd think for a store that has dick molding kits it'd be a joke
so apparently the car got towed with me passed out in the back seat.
I need you there. I need someone to glance at when other people inevitably annoy me.
I am the murdurer of this scooby doo episode
I hate how she's getting mean with age
Meh, you can't hate. That's our basic life goal and you know it.
One day I'll learn not to get drunk on a plane. Today is not that day.
It's one of the few times I hit fuck it levels of not caring
Because I chose to live vicariously through your uterus and you're letting me down right now.
Had a very good bday. Have the teeth marks and bruises to prove it
Randomize
