Third unemployed latin in my bed this week. I'm on a roll
better yet, through the bookshelves. like an intellectual glory hole
he started fingering my stomach rolls instead of my vag... am i really that fat?
Just walked in and was handcuffed to a police woman. Fire fighter woman poured franzia down my throat. Aaaaand I just ate cookies off of Little Red Riding Hood's tits.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
okay. so this hammed chick got arrested and she keeps trying to make out with the cop. i like her style.
Coming out of the blackout mid beej was nice. Seeing her face was not.
They have a stripper pole on their deck. Normal.
You woke me up at 2 am to tell me I could pee in a golf club if I wanted to.
If they were bad they leave that night, if they were good they get a gold star, and if they were great they get invited back. Simple.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Have I showed you the picture of my vagina with a little bang flag coming out of it?
Pretty sure the cop told you that you were the first person he pulled over for being drunk on a tractor. So there's that.
If I'm gonna have a rotation of guys, I really should stop them leaving boob bruises...
I know you told me I shouldn't go see him...that's why I'm texting you letting you know I made it home safe from his house this morning
Apparently when you start crushing adderall and blending them into your margaritas calling them blenderalls you have "a problem" WTF
My sister gave me satin sheets. We can fuck on satin sheets.
Randomize