your life is more of a joke than dina lohan.
if you\'re going to compare me please pick the classy one. Michael Lohan.
Your friends ate a hole through an entire loaf of bread
I think in growing up..I've been having a hard time masterbating to fictional characters
You broke a cabinet. You were climbing up it and it collapsed on you. Lines were crossed.
Being the adderall dealer on campus, I feel responsible for everyone graduating.
I don't care. I'll text you about my butthole whenever I please. That's what you signed up for in this relationship.
Absinthe night with my dad again, I could get used to this being home thing.
He said I was cute and he handed me a stuffed bear from his car. I don't care that he was 80, I named it Hector.
I'm auditing financial statements and ur growing weed this is bullshit how did this happen to me
Aka reading hardcore gay robot porn as a steady trickle of elementary schoolers walk by me every so often and im still in uniform as there councilor
Who is also still dressed up as a pirate
Of the past 48 hours, 46 of them have been spent naked. I'd say it's been a good two days.
for some reason leaving your socks onmakes it less meaningful.
When he mumbled "I can't feel my legs," proceeded to stand, fall over, and just lay there I knew I'd given great head...
Alright, I've had enough of this good girl shit. Tonight you either blackout or backout.
Peru was great. He sent me a text after thanking me for my amazing morals which confused me but made me oddly proud...then he texted a correction. He meant my amazing oral. Sadly this Made me prouder. Fuck u bitches and ur morally inhibiting gag reflexes.
Randomize
