I hope the kids appreciate the fact that I jizzed on her instead of on their slide.
Bad news is im a slut again. Good news is its with people ive been a slut with before.
i literally laid in bad for an hour last night thinking of what i'm going to name my cats when i become a cat lady.
The visine ive been using for four yrs expired. in sept. of 2001.....i will never question my eye problems again.
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Day 8 of being sober: Sniffed an empty beer bottle at a restaurent and almost licked it. This is not working
officially hit rock bottom.. been yelling through the vent in my room to my little brother trying to convince him to get me water for the past two hours. i fear feeling the full effect of my hangover if i stand.
She proposed we share a dildo. Hopefully she was joking.
All I know is I drank too much, danced too little.. yet somehow woke up on the floor in the arms of some cowboy.
You know you're drunk when you're apologizing for your asshole at 4am to the toilet. Eat shit habanero bbq sauce, you've ruined my life.
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Can we both just take a day off just to have sex? Is that acceptable as an adult?
NO FUCKING RANDOMS IN AN ALLEY
I HAVE 5 FELTING NEEDLES AND THEYRE GOING DIRECTLY INTO YOUR EYES IF YOU POST THAT SHIT
I was having a serious heart-to-heart, and then the weed gummy kicked in.
the police dropped me off. that's how my night went.
I share a birthday weekend with Easter this year, so that fucking sucks. I hate sharing...and I have to share with fucking Jesus this year.\n
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