Grossest hangover story of 09: Puked in the bathtub. I was in it.
He's a collector of sorts
Any cool stuff?
You should see the collection of booggers in the carpet next to his desk
I'm drunk at the doctor. It's not that fun. Overrated in fact.
still drunk. talking shit to the doc drawing my blood. this has no upside
I just saw someone EAT a flashcard out of frustration. Finals suck.
He came in like 30 seconds. That's how I know he hasn't been cheating on me while I've been gone
He just told me he's been drinking vodka at work all day. I'm starting to believe in soul mates.
I pretty much threw up on him while he slept, I had one task today which was to wash the sheets that I threw up on and I turned them pink. I would leave me if I could
I mean there is a rehab there so its gotta be a good time
My roommate is watching gummy bears "race" from a mega-marshmallow to his lava lamp.
Sitting topless in my room drinking wine from a box... It's good to be back at school
Once he bit me I drew the fucking line.
So I've already made 5 bad decisions today, wyd?
Certain restrictions may apply. Common side effects of sex with me include unbridled joy, a healthy glow, soreness and the inability to walk for short to long amounts of time. If any of these side effects occur please consult your physician, so he/she can prescribe me a "high-five".
I wanted to have a threesome but they’re TOO HETERO
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