Is it possible to jerk off a nipple?
his ringtone is the jonas brothers. get me the fuck out of here NOW.
She was sleeping without a shirt so I thought I wouldI sneaked a peek at her nipples..than I realized they were just warts...on her back.
I queefed so loud it echoed.
He had rug burn on his nose from my landing strip
So, how do I go about conveying: I'm sorry, yet very glad she is having my abortion. Via text msg?
In class ... We were just assigned groups for the quarter... Remember that night we took shots from that guys pants? I now know his name
put me on a leash or i'm going to fuck someone
Her stripper name is Geico. I'm not drunk or creative enough to make this up.
I'm not trying to be dramatic but if someone makes you choose between getting a Brazilian or dying. For the sake of your sanity just fucking die
Just gave a blow job while wearing a shirt that says 'world's coolest mom' idk how my conscience feels...
Ok how about tonight me and you get laid together. Same girl. Then she signs our dicks.
As weird as it sounds I would totally be down
Do you remember doing synchronized hip thrusts to Michael Jackson? Probably one of my favorite parts of the night
I want you to know that the guy who peed in your bed got fat.
Shame - the story of my life.
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