Umm I'm too high to move.
just saw an anti-abortion rally outside of the courthouse...so naturally i tossed them out a coat hanger i found in my car
it was like brushing your tongue but with a fucking long toothbrush.
He is going to sleep with me. That's all there is to it. I'm 4 for 4 right now. I'm not making it 4 for 5.
in light of our recent drunken behavior, i think it's time we seriously consider hiring ourselves a babysitter.
She set an alarm on my phone for her birthday. Place: Her bed.
Repeat the weekend mantra. "I like boys with teeth, I need boys with teeth, I deserve boys with teeth, I will have boys with teeth".
Hahaahaah I keep finding little notes you left me on my physics notes... "TOO HIGH FOR BIRDS"
It's time for everyone's favorite Wednesday night game... WHEEL OF. VODKA!!!!!
I woke up to his balls in my face, so naturally I limboed under him and headed to the bathroom. When I came out he was asleep on the floor.
What's your opinion on eating ass? Just looking for a yes or no
Is that your mom climbing in your window dude
I'm shrooming way too hard to deal with your bullshit at this particular point in time
you know my pussy doesn't know between good and evil
The lady at the liquor store in my hometown just gave ran around the corner and gave me a hug when I came back from being gone for a couple months. My life is complete.
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