I think there's some kind of asian convention downtown. There are thousands and they're all wearing badges and snapping pictures. I feel like I just stepped into your worst nightmare.
yeah so our basement was flooded 4 feet. we just smoke and drank and then went swimming. gotta make the best out of it
I told him I'd have sex with him for fried cheese. Does that make me a hooker or just fat?
She was surprised when she saw all our living room furniture was made from old kegs. It's like she's never met us before...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I found your doppelganger. same hair, eyes, personality, catch phrases, and penis. it was mind-boggeling.
So much for doing Irish car bombs in my grandpa's memory.... Asshole.
Dude, for twins they have shockingly different blowjob styles.
STOP FUCKING MY SISTERS!!!!
And he came all over himself. At least he didn't ruin my new lulus.
Actually though that could've been bad.
damnit. I just found my cousin on tinder.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Blacked out drunk in California and woke up somewhere in Arizona, I'm pretty sure I got here on foot
I'm never celebrating Galentine's Day again. It was a whorrific mess.
He was simultaneously rubbing my shoulders and fucking me. I'm keeping him.
I’m home.
I’m aware. I just dropped you off.
someone is getting fuckign RAWDOGGED on this campus as we speak and it makes me FURIOUS
I'm not gonna lie, but for some reason I have this strong desire to watch porn with my pint of haagen das.
Randomize