you're bored at work aren't you?
I'm toying with the idea of beating off under my desk
Oh please, I could turn a Vienna Boys Choir concert into a shit show
i found her turbo button.....if you know what i mean.
Just hungoverly hit my funny bone with a hot straightener. Triple threat.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he has the hands of the vagina gods.
If you hit me with your dick and make light saber noises we are breaking up. I don't care if it's your birthday, you are not a sex Jedi.
So is singing the star wars theme as I put the condom on off limits?
I took in his dog. My exboyfriend still calls me for 2 things, blow jobs and animal rescue. I need to end this cycle
My unemployment came through so I'd like to thank the taxpayers of Utah in advance for my level of intoxication this weekend
Do you remember our dinosaur noises from last night ? Breaaaahhhhhppp
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Any story that involves the words "bloody hand job" and/or "sliced penis" is bound to be a good one, right?
I remember looking at his body and thinking wow you have a body sculpted by Jesus himself. Still not sure if I said that out loud or not
what's your room number? I've never been there sober...
Only real friends lend their restraints to engagedfriends to fool around with married strangers.
Doing shots with my high school valedictorian. Bucket list
Stupid Covid-19
The universal cock block of this decade
Randomize