This bar receipt from last night makes no sense
You were wasted and got mad that it was too high so you subtracted 50 bucks in the tip line from the total
I wish that would've worked
If you can't do the LSAT hung over. You can't do the LSAT. That's the real practice.
i came on her dog
I think I might stay on campus instead of going home for thanksgiving and see how many townies I can hook up with and no one will be around to judge
I came home ate all of my roomates poptarts and then vommited on her duvet cover. I don't think today is the day to suggest the whole "sex instead of rent money" idea
I NEVER left your party last night of anyone asks.
Yeah, I didn't wake up handcuffed to my bed either.
I got laid and laid off at a conference in long beach all on the same day
Eh. They balance each other out
I asked you if you needed a ride and you kept saying "no, my name is katelyn"
I passed out with my wizard stick taped to my hands and got woken up being poked with a St. Bernard
You said you'd make me a thank you card for taking care of your drunk ass. I'll be expecting that monday.
I offered to give him "road head" while he played GTA 5. I think he will be more optimistic about date night in the future.
It hurts to hear and I can smell shapes.
just woke up. hair smells like weed and bbq. shins are bruised. vague memory of us chasing deer at the park at 3 am. fill me in on what exactly happened.
I've never seen so much of my blood outside me. After the initial shock it was kind of cool.
I honestly just wanna put my face in her tits and disappear from this plane of existence
Randomize
