Holy cold harsh reality of sobriety batman
Is it normal that I have to take off my pants to get mouth stitches removed?
Get dressed up for her? please, I could shit my pants and she would still blow me
he was so excited that he found the elusive clitoris. i was like look christopher colombus, just because you found it doesnt mean you knew what to do with it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What kind of friend are you? You don't even blackout anymore.
My mom wanted me and my brother to have some bonding time before I left for school. Our bonding time consisted of us smokin a few bowls then goin to Red Robin to cure the munchies. Ooo how I love family time :)
There is NOTHING better than watching a child being chased by an ostrich.
We fucked on top of all of our English papers in celebration of the semester ending.
No fucking idea. Just paid for my chipotle in chocolate coins, though. Either there is a huge language barrier happening here, or my big boobs are finally paying off.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think im definitely allergic to shell fish. Or hungover. Probably both.
We lost track of him for only 10 min and he gets kicked out for sneaking into the kitchen and trying to operate the deep fryer.
I am more familiar with your toilet than I ever want to be with any appliance
I JUST MADE OUT WITH A BRITISH SOCCER PLAYER. LONG LIVE THE QUEEN. GOD BLESS THAT COUNTRY.
My dick looks like crazy bread
pics are now mandatory
Operation terrify all men while simultaneously make them fall in love with me is going quite swimmingly so far
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