i think im having one of those erections lasting four or more hours
angela screamed across the room SHES A CHAMP when i told the pharmacist plan b doesnt make me throw up
So for Valentine's Day...I finally swallowed. I feel like I earned that steak.
Theres a dude at this concert at the urinal double fisting beers, taking drinks from both while simultaneously pissing euerywhere. He is my hero
some dude is stoned out of his mind in my calc class. just shouted that the teacher was a genius cause he got rid of so many numbers
i have a wrist watched drawn on my wrist that it says shot o clock
Tell your boss that he's keeping you from eating a fuck sundae off of these 36-24-36 34 D's waiting for you at home on Valentine's Day.
I really don't think you should have 'baptized' your tattoo in vodka the same night you got it.
New hot neighbor boys moving in across from us...So i did the logical thing and bought two 30 packs up the hill and walked right by em. Consider the line hooked and ready to reel.
Nothing like waking up naked and alone on your floor to remind you that you make life mistakes often.
There is what appears to be urine on the woman's bathroom sink. I just have so many questions right now.
Naked. naked and bneed help.
Well yeah. Plus. My dick looks awful. So I would need to do some extreme makeover dick edition before even starting something so ridiculous.
I wore grinch underwear to my well woman exam this morning and I feel like I adulted successfully today.
I just want to trace his tattoos with my tongue
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