why do they call them blowjobs? ....unless i'm doing it wrong?
Just caught my bro jerking off to a lane Bryant catalog
i was hoping the water fountain would somehow shoot out vodka this morning
Wat the fuck dude ketchup in my bong???
handjobs have no place on a baseball diamond
thats because you have standards... and i have a thing for guys that give me free drugs.
Every part of me is in agreement...but mostly my vagina
I'm pretty sure that I drunkenly used the phrase "I just want his beard all over my body" way too many times last night.
Yeah I ended up covered in the mud by the end, in a lady bug golf cart that was blasting jazz music with a dead phone
I added a U.S. Senator on snapchat....casual.
How are you feeling?
I mean, shattered dignity aside, not bad.
I'm still home, my life isn't together. Currently drying my pants
I WANNA SUCK HIS DICK ON A BOAT
quit whining, rub some dirt on it, and lets get out there
its my penis
YOU FUCKED THE DARE INSTRUCTOR DIDN'T YOU?
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