Exactly how deep of a burn should you have when you pee before becoming legitimately concerned?
It had been so long since my last time that it was easily a double helping of stomach pancakes. I think she was mildly impressed.
watching espn. realized that the exact place those sportcenter guys are is where I got laid on the beach last superbowl. my sex spot is broadcasted nationwide
Im blasting "Fat Bottom Girls" as loud as humanely possible in attempts that old ladies doing water aerobics will take the hint and get the fuck out of the pool.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My roommate says its rare that you can be tear gassed before you lose your virginity so i feel accomplished in life
She's the second Ashley to meet and blow me in the same night. Sensing a trend.
I've smoked enough weed to put down a pony.
He hasn't left the hospital without a nurse's number all year. My nurses are always ugly or men. Wtf bro
Fuck you for setting me up with the guy from the Nickelback cover band
Payback for not stopping me from fucking the guy in the wookie costume
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sitting here reading the internet and all i have to show for this summer is a shitty tan and the possible case of clamidia.
Unless you're gonna start buying my underwear, you have got to stop ripping it off of me.
Would "deck the halls with penises " be an appropriate event title? I know peni is the plural but flow of the tongue as well
I didn't notice because vodka
Wanna know what sucks. Banging the bosses daughter at work and having the boss walk in while you are fucking on his desk. Good day though. Made 6 sales
Kid got so high from the brownies he forgot his own name. Welcome to college.
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