We made a late night liquor run, made margaritas and bloody marys and then retreated to opposite sides of the house to drink them. Alone.
You guys make me sad
You misspelled jealous there
It got kind of awkward when her dad brought home a 20 something asian girl at 3am
Those foam number one hands, are the BEST socks.
asked the girl next to us on line to take a picture of us and she shared her bacardi. i love white people.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Also when they left they could only find one sock between the two of them. Apparently we're like crazy sock ripping vixens when we bring guys home drunk
you want a dog just so you can strap a barrel of hot chocolate around its neck?
Your grammar in that last text message was so awful.. My vagina wants to go crawl in a hole, and never speak to you again.
Eh maybe I should give her a chance. Let's see where making a porno takes the friendship
MY TWIN SISTER IS ENGAGED. I REPEAT, MY SCREW UP OF A SISTER IS ENGAGED. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
I'll be there in 20 with vodka.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was less embarrassed asking him to torrent the teen mom's porn. I'm not gonna ask him to about season 4 of PLL.
Hey I'm coming to get my gin do you want a good luck blowjob for your exam tmrw
We had a quickie at work in the office. He walked out before me, and I fell asleep while waiting a few minutes to walk out. Yeah. He's got that change your life dick
Nothing ruins an orgasm faster than accidentally calling out his boss's name
This is a weird combination of planning and sexting but whatever
man do I wish I knew who this naked guy in my room was...
Randomize