Omg. Never. Take a laxative the day you are going on. A date.
no more hot dogs for you........
fine no more vajj for you
the lady next to me just sniffed my hair, smiled, and then fell asleep. I almost started crying from that kind of creepiness
don't cry, we can learn from her
I figured you left because I was a shit show. Were you still there when I got locked in the bathroom and didn't know where I was? If not, that could have been a dream. I'm still not sure.
I need to make a new year's resolution to only pee in toilets. And it needs to start happening before the new year.
it still weirds me out that Robin Thicke is Alan Thicke's son
Now theyre filling the kiddie pool water with boxes and boxes of jello powder and im not sure if thats a sign i should leave or what
I'm trying. I feel like we're trying to have sex with fruitcake. dry and boring.
Also I'm so used to having sex with river guides that when he pulled out a condom I was actually surprised
bought a large fruitopia from McDonalds at 7:45 this morning. Spilled it on the ground. Cried. THAT hungover.
I need a hobby that isn't dick related
Just paid for birth control in all ones do you think she is judging me?
Just boned her on my desk. on top of my term paper. take that professor dipshit
Did you guys just have three hour sex? You both stopped and restarted texting me at the same time
If I were to say yes, would we still be friends?
She shit herself again. We're calling her the "Queen of Sharts".
Randomize
