So how Liz Lemon is this? I bring a boy home, we get in bed, and I realize there's a lean pocket wrapper in the sheets.
Go to google and type XXX
.......Is that how you look for porn?
He had one of those small greek statue penises
In hindsight maybe we should have moved his homework instead of playing quarters on top of it.
My eyes got the double whammy. Once with pepperspray from the riot the other with cum. Both of which i did nothing to deserve.
Spent the last thirty minutes staring at the wall with Leah. It's definitly moving
I'm in a hotel full of Marines. I'm leaving here pregnant.
So worth it. Come over for bacon egg cheese vusquit later. 12. I slept with Jimmy? On my period? And told him he had mother issues? No tequila. Tequila bad.
I am in serious pain and you're making dick jokes. I hope you wind up with crotch rot.
As much as my throat was opened up this weekend, you'd think I wouldn't nearly choke on a damn almond.
I don't know what happened last night. But I just woke up in the high school boiler room
I should've negotiated that before I sat on his face.
JB just got pulled over and I am in the trunk...... this isnt good
Well I just masturbated while reading a recipe for Alfredo sauce so I guess you could say I’m growing up
I talked to his mom for a good 10 minutes with coke all over my nose. Not the best first impression
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