he said i was the most charming throwing up drunk person hes ever taken care of. so of course i had sex with him.
he made a joke about you fucking his daughter...i think youre golden
This girl has a mullet weave. I missed oakland.
I feel like death gave me a hand job
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
His cuteness will no longer contol my vagina
I gasped. Both pairs of lips did.
The universe is cradling this hangover like a gay couple cradles their newly adopted chinese baby.
If you need to be the damsel in drunken distress make sure it's before 3.
thanks again for a nice night (and please don't fuck my boss)
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Under no circumstances is tits McGee to make that kind of decision about my life!
I felt I lost my designated buddy on a field trip when you wandered off to get high with strangers.
He suffocated between her tits, but she didn't notice because he still came.
Well I'm half drunk in a green tutu at a chipotle. So pretty good parade.
Next time you decide to post pictures of yourself in your underwear on facebook, please don't tag me as your bulge.. My mom spent 10 minutes looking for me in that picture. I had to tell her I was hiding.
when i was on the highway she passed out and knocked my transmission into nuetral with her forehead...that was an experience
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