Ambien. No doubt about it.
sometimes i shoot so far i amaze even myself.
the mole on his forehead could get me off better than his dick
please tell me you have proof of this
Bret has after-school detention for writing Brianna has a stinky vag on the ground at recess.
It's sad really how 5 am brings with it a distinction from drunken to pathetic.
They had to restock the bar 3 times before midnight. There is a bridesmaid dress hanging in a tree outside.
You didn't see us wave? How could you not? We were all going like 10mph screaming at you. We were stoned and didnt wanna run over pedestrians
he spent an hour trying to convince us that Ted Nugent is Kid Rock from the future. by the end of it i was very close to believing him.
Nothing ends a night of heavy drinking better than banging to three six mafia in your own driveway
Going through my bras is like traveling back in time through my past hookups and relationships....
earned some solid air miles from the plan B I just bought. #silverlinings
Omg cinnamon bun Oreos. Thanks weed
Everything isn’t always sunshine & rainbows. Sometimes there’s tequila.
Dude, fuck these noisy kids, fuck all this light, and fuck you for getting to sleep while I have to be productive and hungover.
Just realized how behind i am. Will gradually increase drinking until i don't remember that i missed an entire year of class.
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