I'm scared at the amount of beastiality in this conversation.
We already established this. No, he did not cum on the dog.
Just threw up in nordstroms while shopping for moms bday with dad. He distracted workers for me. No more tequila
I know now the amount of smoke it takes to set off the fire alarm....no longer worried about using the bong...not even close
I hope he didn't notice that my shirt was inside out when I told him I didn't have sex with the guy. Kind of a dead giveaway.
you sat in the middle of your kitchen floor feeding your dog blueberries one by one
Things I can say. There is a photo of me pouring whipped cream into a midgets mouth.
you know who we are? We're the female white stoner version of Kenan and Kel.
Also, they sell weed-chocolate covered strawberries. For the romantic stoner.
That was one of the best texts I got today
So hungover. Walked into room and poached their catering before realized in wrong place. Scowled and ate it anyway
I got my first tattoo & injured myself while having sex in a national monument. I say we consider this weekend siezed.
He was stoned laying on my bed singing I'm a little tea cup while I took a pregnancy test. Thank god it was negative.
So his dick was definitely bigger than it looked in all the pictures he sent my daughter.
I was so drunk, he put me to bed and went down stairs to hang out with his friends. Apparently, I was curled up in the closet, spooning the dresser when he came back up.
He fucked me while I was smoking his blunt. His apartment was trashed and he drives a van that looks like it’s been hit by a train but still 10/10 would fuck again.
Randomize
