just sold my soul for a pack of cigaroos. little do they know they got the short end of the deal. suckers.
Go to google and type XXX
.......Is that how you look for porn?
Anthony wouldn't know good sex if it sat on his face
i went to toss her salad and she had a toilet paper clinger on one of the hairs
Apparently oprah and I were in competition to see who's ass could get bigger this summer
I am going to be the most sexually active ladybug that he has ever seen
i woke up, turned over, and noticed an assortment of knives stuck in my wall. i should prob stop drinking
Remember that pineapple I soaked in vodka last month? Just found it- nothing is growing on it? Think it's safe?
I'm starting to second guess shaving my vagina over the kitchen sink. The lighting is so much better though.
There is a hatefuck that has the destruction level of an atom bomb raging through my viens just aching to vaporize her.
so let me get this straight... she's showing a cameltoe that can be seen from the space station and I'm NOT supposed to stare?
I feel like my sexual preferences are just another sign that I am a 75 year old drag queen in a 29 year old woman's body.
NO FUCKING RANDOMS IN AN ALLEY
I'm sorry I threw a frog in your car last night.
Legit just looked at the gin bottle and said, “Aw fuck, I’m going to feel this in the morning.”
Randomize
