So does your leg always twitch violently when someone plays with your clitoris? Or has my ten years of piano playing finally paid off?
she came to the game with a camelback filled with booze. except it was only the bag part so she duct taped to her back
Fat spanish girl grinding against air conditioner. ive seen everything now
Jus posted an album so big that it takes my manhood into question
I am intoxicated and cannot bring you a burrito. However, if you want to bring ME one...
Dude. The walls are totally staring at me right now. I told you this was a bad idea.
Saw on the news tonight that Hamilton county's syphilis rate is 9x the national average...use protection!
Thanks, mom.
Remind me to switch to jello when you decide to do shots off my ass. It's so much easier to clean than this pudding.
I just let my hand run under cold water for five minutes. I couldn't stop staring at it and the only things I could think about were how amazing it felt, how cool water was, and what a wonderful world it is that we live in. Reasons why I don't smoke...
Dinner?
YES CON MARGARITAS POR FAVOR!!!! MUCHO MARGARITAS!!!
last night on the strip the guy screamed at you YOU GOTTA WORK ON YOUR CALVES.
He said he'd prefer a photo rather than discuss politics, I sent him a snapchat "conservative shorts 4 conservative man". He said "be liberal"
You know it was a good night when visa fraud prevention services are calling
I'm dangerously close to tossing this whole "morals" bullshit and swan-diving into the fuckboy lifestyle.
You should have thought of that before emitting walrus sounds while intoxicated
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