Black thong, sheer white shorts not a professional look. This chick has no idea what sunlight makes her outfit look like.
hahaha our party bus just died on the freeway and we're drinking in the center divider. i'm on the roof. i win
i sold my breathalizer so i could buy weed
He tried to blame not having a condom on the economy.
How do you get eyebrow wax out of your butthole region?
The fact that you aren't ashamed to ask that is the reason I will give you the answer. Under the sink there is a bottle of wax remover. Throw my waxing kit away as well.
he swears he got herpes from a bowl of soup
My patience ran out after you started clapping at the strippers everytime they took off a piece of clothing.
It was a two-sided wall so part of my body ended up in someone elses condo.
That white girl was surprised to see orange pubes around my black cock. Happy Halloween!
Do you think they manscape in the zombie apocalypse?
the puppy had a little leather gag and was using a ball gag as a fetch toy
I am now picking what guy I will hang out with based on how many Pokémon they live near.
Found a trail of Taco Bell hot sauce packets through the garage to our back door and cheese in my bra. I'll say it was a successful Sunday Funday.
i believe in u and ur pee
Jack said he hasn't jerked off in like two weeks and he's like a smoldering volcano who wants to bury you like Pompeii with his man gravy
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