i finally understand why guys leave in the middle of the night.......they got it right
So some girl kept staring at me and giving me these weird looks. That's when I realized she could probably hear the Mulan soundtrack playing on my iPod...
I mean, she is a dancer for the Suns. If I didnt fuck her that would just be bad team spirit.
his pokemon pajamas? the fact that he was proud of the stretchmarks on his arms? or finding out he has a daughter that went to high school with us? ...you tell me what was the dealbreaker
It's sad because pictures are supposed to say a thousand words, and theirs just say 'fat'
he rubbed his balls on my face to wake me up.. this friends with benefits thing is getting out of hand.
And you kept repeating "I didn't know know that this was a no blow job zone."
I know. I almost started crying. IN WHAT UNIVERSE IS THAT A TURN ON?!
Noooo. We thought it would be funny for him to wake up buried in the sand. But we just remembered about the whole high tide thing and it's dark and it's pretty damn hard to find an unconscious head sticking out of the sand. Just help us out
we were sitting on his couch watching tv and laughing at how funny the voices on the commercial were, then we realized the volume wasn't on.
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
I'm currently being signed up to be painted nude for a college art class. ah yes best high decision ever
you gave a quesadilla a blow job with sour cream at Denny's.
He's slurring his text. I didn't think that was possible.
And on the way out from Applebee's he tried to take the basket of toothpicks claiming he was using them as a tax write off. Last time I babysit my dad on thirsty Thursday.
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