Going back to my hometown to drink absinthe with highschool boys. Remind me to evaluate this decision tomorrow.
its 4th on my favorites list. 1. butt sex 2. mini skirts 3. three meat pizza rolls 4. fuck the pain away by peaches
I mean I'm basically single. Or maybe just an asshole. Either way.
i jus dunped the rest of my drink down the sink and tool my bra off. pretty sure this is the best decision for everybody.
I wish we could tell the moving van to wait at the strip club for a while.
I'm going to go out on a limb and say last night was a success, also the neighbors are counting down the days until we move out.
Yaaaayyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy! It has more than one y so my intentions to sleep with you after the drink special ends are clear
I threw up in the kitchen on the floor and a guy tried cleaning it up with a spoon at a party.
We need to get stoned and watch Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles 2. This has become a priority. Schedule accordingly.
I found him in the kitchen singing German metal into a banana while simultaneously mixing brownie batter. He didn't have any pants on.
He threw me over his shoulder and carried me outside, all the while drinking from the bottle of rum he was holding, while my ex watched. I'm winning the break-up.
we are not taking body shots with the irish cream
I am the oldest one here and I STILL feel like I need an adult. help.
So about that you can bill me for the chair but it was David's idea to jump from the window sill into the washer with "clothing pillows of cloudiness" to land on to get ahold of him you have to phone his mother
I just talked to her she really hates you like a lot
Apparently I repeatedly thanked the paramedic for saving the "happy new year" beads i was wearing. that bad.
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