why is jon gosselin on the news 24/7 for dating some new lady?? how bout I get on msnbc for not getting laid since forever ago
ill be fine wheb you get back. I'm gunna do real world things like washing the dishes. having to perform serious tasks brings you down.
He had a shameless baby voice when he was talking to my dog. There's no way I'm making it through the night with my clothes on.
8:30 every morning in the third floor bathroom we fuck in the handicap stall. You have your morning workout and I have mine.
You need to be more adventurous.
I am! Just not in a "I wanna get diseases" way
Right now I'm standing in front of my fridge, drinking wine out of the bottle and eating cold steak with my hands. I am THE BEST at being single.
I don't think a gay three way is the best way to confirm your sexuality.
I can't remember dinner
Hahaha "rub in the ketchup on your face, It'll just look like blush." some gay waiter said that to you, and you go "good idea!"
It's def pee. WHY DO I PEE ON THINGS WHEN I DRINK TEQUILA
God gave me a talent besides one night stands. I feel like I should use it
The woman in the flower onesie is claiming she hasn't been drinking.
Plus idk what to say. Like hello dapper gentleman will you pursue me in a midnight hangout where I can be choked
You guys go ahead and have your romantic night. I'm gonna keep my vday tradition alive of angry banging a stranger.
And remember people can't hear you kick ass in space
dude im trying to eat his ass so can you stop for 10 minutes
Randomize
