can "i'm close!" be our safe word(s)?
oh geez, wrong person.
Liz and I are now offficially highest. OH, and your girlfriend may be a vampire. Heads up. SPARKLESSSSS
Put my glitter back.
Last night started off great but became the saddest day of my life when i was drunk in a hotel room eating day old mac and cheese out of a yatzee cup with a coffee lid as a spoon...
he's werid. hell kiss me after i go down on him but he wont kiss me after i eat anything with mustard.
just got in my apt...and theres jungle juice here i left from over a month ago..this could be interesting...or deadly
I dont know how to respond to your rave picture. I mean yeah, he's hot, but it just seems wrong to be like "Please tell me you fucked that guy with the pacifier!"
Idk. I'm naked in front of the computer eating ribs. All is right with the world.
That's so nerdy and hot at the same time.
Sitting in airport bathroom. Guy walks into toilet next to me and announces "I want to apologize to the entire airport for what I'm about to do"
Who are these men, what are we doing here, how is this helping us toward our goals of sex and pasta? Things to consider.
It's probably not healthy how legit bummed I am that my bottled of wine is gone.
I walked so much yesterday and I was like holy fuck I need to do some cardio apart from sex cause this is ridic
while giving me head, she stopped, looked up at me smiling and said "ill never be able to look at bananas the same way again" and then went back to work.
she just punched him in the balls in front of everyone and yelled "YOU SEE WHAT YOU MADE ME DO"
Look idk the rules and regulations of our freindship...but I need you to carry me to my car.
Yes. I had to slow down my handjob so he would last...-and I give shitty handjobs to begin with
Randomize
