Party's warming up, a tranny just got here...
Only a mothe r could love this liver
Five things that make you perfect. Go.
The skin of a dead hooker. The blood of the innocent. The soul of a kitten. The hat from cat in the hat. And sunglasses.
this chick on a show just showed her boobs and let some guy paint them others asked why she did it and her reply i quote "i was bored" why dont chicks get bored more often
she said she'd blow me if I bought one of her sorority raffle tickets. Goddamn it's gettin easy
If I had a penis, I would stick it EVERYWHERE. I don't know what these guys are doing.
porn star boner night. come get it.
I traded the garbage men the rest of my handle for a ride home. Best. Walk. Of. Shame. Ever.
You called to teach me about fire safety, meowed a whole bunch, said "I hope you are not on fire" and hung up.
On my way home from the dentist. Was going to call and see if you would like to wake and bake, then remembered my sister is an adult
We had sex to beyonce's "drunk in love" and then he order me pizza. It was perf
You also proposed and then tried to jack me off
I feel as if I need Plan B just being in the same room as them for more than 5 minutes.
he's a fucking beast. people that don't even know him have started calling him "puke and raleigh"
I'm disgusted with myself. Who goes down on their Uber driver? This asshole
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