You have more facebook pictures than most towns have people.
I hate that the only Italian aspect of me is I get red and sweaty when I drink
yea i thought the egg drop soup tasted weirdly like cum, and then i suddenly remembered what happened last night.
i'm never eating chinese again.
Dude. Apparently I just smoked some stuff that's used for Nigerian spirit quests.
well I already know I'm going to hell, at this point it's really go big or go home
The chick got into the cab with us and said we have 3 chances to guess what she just stuck up her ass. Hello to you to!
I remember having the weirdest thoughts and thinking our room was a compass and we were in the compass or something.
I think you should just bang him and get it out of your system.
That's what you say about everyone.
Is posting a pic on insta of my previously dyed blue pubes socially acceptable?
Using the money underagers give me to buy this semesters books.. My mom would be so proud
There is an unwrapped tampon, a condom, a rubber chicken and a slim Jim currently sitting on our dining room table.
In other news, I just threw up my burrito and am currently on all fours literally crawling back to my bed
dad is drunk and texting us pictures of bread
It's hard picking what to wear when you know the plan is sex. Like can't I just wear my robe let's just simplify this.
it’s my vagina i can do what i want to
Randomize
