Every time we have sex I can't stop thinking about Jesus
Do you ever think that bumblebee is the gay transformer?
Every day of my life.
Who would have thought google would have HELPED me fail a test...not pass...thank you pacman, thank you google....
You left a trail of sequins from your dress incase we got lost
And she was like "I wanted you all for myself, to love you, and treat you like gold."... See this is why I shouldn't fuck Italian chicks...
I woke up to him drunk-t-bagging me, saying "huevos rancheros" were being served for breakfast.
I really wanna know when trying to grow up turned into try not to throw up.
Chilling. The soap was talking at one point if I rememeber right...
THE HALLOWEEN QUEST WILL BE PICS OF US IN OUR COSTUMES IN EXCHANGE FOR DICK PICS. IT HAS BEEN DECIDED.
Your the only person to come back from spring break with a non std related infection
Welcome to Missouri, the show me your genitals state.
But for real though. That weed tastes like the jolly laughter of Santa Claus.
My frontal lobe is being piloted by Jack Daniels right now.
BTW, does Anne know that we used the lipstick she is currently wearing to was used to write the word "ASS" on my ass cheeks last night?
I just lost my handcuff virginity and not in the sexy way.
Randomize