Don't fret. That vag would have consumed a lesser man.
She does have a great personality.
Yeah, in her vagina.
soo apparently i was out of money so i stayed in the bathroom for an hour-ish passing out paper towels for money..needless to say i got kicked out
i dont think the girl sending me nudes is qualified to pass judgement on me
Some ambulance just rolled up to this bar and this girl just hops out of the back and walks inside
Who cheats on Christmas eve? It's just asking for Jesus to hate you
i licked icing off his dick. in front of his sister.
This is your monthly public service announcement that sexual services will temporarily cease from Wednesday night to Monday. Please plan accordingly and have a nice day =D
nothing says roomie bonding better than a sunday shroom trip.
Half my face is frozen, my vagina is broken, I'm wearing only gym shorts eating a plate of mashed potatoes, avatar is on my tv. There's a naked guy on my couch whose name idk. I needa talk to you asap
Curled up in the fetal position, trying not to throw up or think about my future, and humming songs from musicals to myself. You?
I learn from experience and I experienced what it would be like to completely lose my mind and then wake up with a stab wound.
All of my exes are either overweight and neckbearded or dead. Someone out there is looking out for me.
My fart just smelled like the inside of white castle, I mean spot on, no difference whatsoever.
My last memory of last night was being in a laundry room doing blow and admiring a washer and dryer... I think that's the earmark of old age
Randomize
