So are we goin out tonight?
Dude, we woke up in your car in some parking lot last night...
And that was fun, wasn't it?
It must have been true love
I don't call true love eating a bag of doritos and then going down on each other
I just told my parents that Capt'n Crunch does weird things to my mouth... my dad just stared at me
im naked on webcam to her boyfriend, but im playing neopets at the same time, so its all evened out
at the bar. watching boys pee in urinals. when they come out we give them a thumbs up or a thumbs down. probbb shouldn't prop the bathroom door open with a bar stool....
It ended with me crying and eating pizza in my closet.
To celebrate your birthday last night, I got drunk and sang drift away in buffalo wild wings. Happy birthday. The entire bar sang the chorus with me. It was magical.
there is vodka in my soul right now. The vapor is coming out my nose.
Random Survey Question: If things start getting serious with this cop, do I have to stop doing coke?
He's practically not my boyfriend anymore. So let's go get some glitter, balloons, alcohol and forget this night ever happened.
Your the only person to come back from spring break with a non std related infection
I told him I wish we were at my house cause then I could tell him to get out after we had sex.
We shall need something stronger. Anal lube, the blood of a giraffe, and a bay leaf should do the trick. Make the paste and cover your left knee and anus in it.
Eventually the conversation shifted (as it always does) to Sex toys.
She called a 10 year old handsome and we gave her a look that was equal parts confused and “what the hell is wrong with you”
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