4:25 am: I want you here. Ugh.
Sometimes I wonder why.. Then I realize I can't fool myself with that question bc we all know it's bc of his enormous dick
At least it earned you a couple drinks. And something tells me you've touched grosser things with less incentive.
I don't like finding out that my fuck buddy is a good person.
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Just had a brita power hour to try to counter act all the wine i chugged last night.....fucking franzia
Also, just almost microwaved cereal. Thank god mom is here to stop me.
She asked me to head butt her and after half a bottle of whiskey that seemed reasonable.
He's used the term "balls deep" 3 times in the first hour. Thanks a lot, Plenty of Fish.
Im playing the how drunk can i get before my card declines game. being single sucks. But getting drunk after work alone in fridays on a wenesday night sucks way more.
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I believe you called it tequila and nipples. The proceeded to strike a pose.
He was barking to the beat of "I like to fuck" and then chugged 3 beers and fell off the deck.. I should have gotten community service hours
Apparently drinking in your car before going into a sales meeting is frowned upon. We are car sales men not doctors.
Son of a bitch took my liquid eyeliner
He added me on LinkedIn while I was baking weed brownies in the boxers he left here... Is this adulthood?
Am I required to send a Christmas card to my fuck buddy?