cant go down on her man, her vagoo reminds me of a face hugger from aliens
Jason Williams (yeah the ex-nets center...) drunkenly told me that, while drinking, I should take an ambien and a cialis before i go home...that will "give me a 25 minute window to have sex and then goto sleep before the bitch starts bothering me"....
I just had sex with a black guy. He told me I had a big dick. I think that's God's way of saying it's okay to be gay.
Well if I am having twins, at least I'll finally have 2 kids by the same father.
I'm concerned I'll look like a hooker on new years eve in this outfit
There are different standards on new years eve. To look like a hooker you literally need to be giving a guy head on the street while he's handing you cash.
She said "I've been waiting to suck your cock since high school." I'm so glad so many freshmen are from our school.
Here's the thing, you got road head in two different cars tonight. You feel lucky yet?
You're an asshole. I don't want your dick as my background. I'll look like I have a thumb fetish.
You were walking away to pee and as you were undoing your belt you looked at me and said "the belt is off. the game is on. Remever that."
She was blowing me when her roommate came in and goes "you want me to tap in?"
You realize once your inheritance is finalized this shit will stop happening right?
You said dick pics aren't attractive
Random ones, from strangers, no. But a beautiful penis I know and love, absolutely :3
WHY WONT HOT GETMAN MAKR PUPR WITH ME!!!!???!?!!
Because making bad decisions is what makes our house great and I don't plan on changing that anytime soon.
Just had a med school interview with that doctor I fucked in college. He remembered. Asked if I still have my nipple rings. Overall, I think it went well.
He thought it would be sexy if he found my clothes and dressed me, and it was..until he found a thong under his bed and assumed it was mine. It wasn't
Randomize