direct quote: "i'm so over my clit" either best or most awkward conversation possible with your COUSIN
it turns out jennifers body is not good to beat off to. yeah its megan fox but when she pukes up blood = goodbye boner
just cut a line with my blood donor card...i feel like it will help remind me that i was once a productive member of society.
Go on vacation with her and forget to pack pants. I did that once and it worked like a charm.
No, she passed out instead. I have the worst luck, its like Jesus is mad at me for having the same birthday as him
i yelled at him for a little and we ended up fucking in a random tennis court.
Who the fuck was that guy he kept pulling his dick out walking up to people trying to hand it to people and saying go ahead open the door like it was a door knob
I think i just threw up blood. i can't chill right now;
"I wasn't planning on buying a chicken, but I bought it anyway." --some guy on the bus with a chicken
"Yeah, I only have nine toes." --that same guy
I'm going to miss recovering from hangovers on the beach. Rolling around in my dorm bed and watching Friends reruns is just gonna feel like slumming it.
so it took us like 45 minutes to get into the party.... then when we wanted to leave we were blocked and forced to stay.
....you got kicked INTO a party??
final thoughts: i just want someone into choking me out, weed and anime
How many Hail Marys does a girl need to say to get some quality nudes?
What do you do when you legitimately find a hidden sex dungeon in your parents basement next to your bedroom!!?
It was like Strip poker and blow, but with Yu-Gi-Oh cards
Randomize
